


My Past Lies To Me

by Warriorsqueen



Series: My Past is a Mystery [2]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Maximum Ride - James Patterson, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-19
Updated: 2014-05-22
Packaged: 2018-01-09 06:14:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1142458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warriorsqueen/pseuds/Warriorsqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to "My Past Hides From Me". Agent Max Ride is sent as backup to a certain strike team when they go to take down Centipede. But as time goes by, Max realizes that she's more tangled into SHIELD than she originally thought.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, and welcome to the sequel to My Past Hides From Me. This installment shall run parallel to Agents of Shield, but will eventually deviate into an original plot (unless I chose that plot for a third installment. It depends on how people like this, and how the AOS season pans out.) But the main difference between this and the last installment is that I plan to incorporate other POVs, which will be drastically different stylewise. But we're not there yet. For now, welcome to My Past Lies to Me.

"Today is day 1 of my 30 day mandatory psychological journaling. Recording. Whatever. I mean, I've been working for SHIELD for months now, but _now_ I have to talk to a microphone for a month about my problems. At least I don't have to directly talk to a therapist. I just have to ramble and then they have to eventually sit through hours of my rambling. Sorry. It must suck to be you.

Ok, what do I talk about now? Ok, the paper they gave me says I should talk about what's happened after the Battle of New York. All right, then. Fine. I fought in the battle. We won. My wing mangled. I got hired by SHIELD. I got basic training as a crash course. I started treatments for my wing, which helps but is really annoying. I started in as an agent with Natasha as my CO. Agent Romanova to you people. Her old partner Clint- err.. Agent Barton has been out of the field since the battle. He's a cool dude. Funny. To bad Loki messed his brain up. Ok, what else happened? A bunch of missions. Kicking ass and taking names. Super classified though so hush hush.

So yeah. I spend most of my time training or going on a mission with Nat. Up until a few days ago. The voice decided to be an invasive little bastard while I was on a plane back from a mission over in England. We were helping with some of the cleanup after Thor's visit. I had to help chase down the weird animals. I think they were just trying to get rid of Nat and I, but whatever. Back to the main point. After leaving, the voice decided to give me a brain attack. The last one had been during the battle of New York, so the fancy therapist people thought it was a fancy side effect of PTSD. Which I so  _clearly_ have. Anyways, back to the point. Brain attack. Except it didn't give me anything too special. Except my flo- my old family. Grown up. Happy. Alive. But I know that's not true. And in this, I was with them. But different. Happier. Less scarred. And while I've wishing for years for them to still be alive but-"

Aaaaand there's a knock on my door. I sigh and pause the recorder. "I'm coming, just give me a minute." I stretch as I stand up, and wince as I pull my wings back up close to my body. While they had been healing super quickly and some of my feathers had been growing back in, they weren't fully back and I still needed to have synthetically created feathers implanted for the ones that wouldn't come back at all. Those ones don't grow back. And I still wasn't cleared for flying.

When I opened the door, there stood Clint. "Been reduced to messenger boy?" I teased, crossing my arms.

He smirked, "Only for you. Anyone else would get a post-it on an arrow."

"Even Nat?"

"Nat would be getting me, not the reverse."

I gave a small laugh, "Ok, who needs me this time? I sure as hell hope it's not the therapists again."

"Nope. A top-secret strike team is going in after Centipede. I heard for sure that that guy that we took in from them, Peterson, is going in. I may have also heard your name as well. I don't know. I think that might be slightly above your clearance level." I groan. He really loves pulling the 'higher clearance level' thing.

"Do you know who's leading the team?"

Clint grinned, "Come on, let's go and find out."

 

\-----

 

"Agent Ride"

I stood quietly in front of Agent Hill. I'm not very good yet at not using sarcasm, so I usually just keep very quiet in situations like these. 

"You will be joining recruit Peterson as backup to a strike team running point in our current investigation of centipede. This team is being run by Agent Coulson, who will soon be arriving to pick you and Peterson up. You will follow all orders given to you, and you are not cleared for individual flight except in life or death situations. Should this mission go well, you might remain on as a permanent member of that team."

My eyes were wide. My 'stay silent' routine just did an acrobatic fucking pirouette out the window. 

"Did you say Agent Coulson? As in killed-by-the-same-dude-that fucked-up-my-wing-Coulson?"

Agent Hill rolled he eyes. "Yes. That Coulson. Here was revived shortly after being seen to by a medical team."

I raised an eyebrow, "So you lied to us during the battle?

" _Director Fury_ felt it would be best to lie to all of you, in order for you to become more unified against Loki and the Chitauri. And he was right. No more comments on this matter, and you will not share this information with any of the other Avengers. Now, go suit up so you're ready to leave."

I nodded, too angry to trust my mouth. As, I walked back to my bunks to change and pack, I couldn't help but think about what else SHIELD kept from me. Were there any other secrets about the battle of New York? About my fellow agents? About me or my origins? I never told them my full story, but I don't trust that they don't know it.

It was that moment where I fully realized that, while I do work for SHIELD, I don't trust any of the things they'd ever told me.


	2. Chapter 2

I stepped out of the fancy car in front of the plane (apparently it's called the bus but that's so cheesy) and grabbed my duffel. As I walked on board, I heard the murmurs of the end of a conversation. When I got closer, Coulson gave me a smile. "Agent Ride, welcome to the Bus. Good to see you again."

I smiled wide, hoping my annoyance translated. "Good to see you too Agent Coulson. After all, I thought you died slumped against the wall right next to me. Glad to hear that Fury lied to us all."

The woman-Agent May I believe- shot a look to Coulson. So she doesn't know my story. Good. If she doesn't that means nobody else does. Except Coulson. Clearly.

"I'm sorry, but it was the Director's call. You know that. I heard you were badly injured. Are you cleared to fly?"

I scowled. "No. The synthetic implants I need haven't been perfected yet. Or in reality, the director is waiting because he thinks I’ll flee the second I can fly again."

Coulson gave a smile. "That sounds like him. You should speak with FitzSimmons about designing the pieces for you. They'd do that."

I smirked. "Actually, I already have someone on it. You forget that I know Tony Stark, who will do anything to give a 'fuck you' to SHIELD."

As Agent Peterson entered the plane, I headed up the spiral staircase. As I reached the top, I heard arguing voices ahead. Looks like I know where to head.

Leaving them to argue, I leaned against the doorframe until Coulson and Peterson arrived.

With an awkward start by Ward, Coulson began to introduce the team. Ward (Cap minus the super), Skye (Hacker Han Solo), Fitz and Simmons (Science androids), and Agent May (Tasha's terse secret twin). Then he turned to introduce me "This is Agent-"

"Max Ride, codename Talon, at your service. I guess I'm here because I'm also modified by science."

"Who experimented on you? I hadn't heard of any super soldier programs that used female subjects-no offence" I believe that was science android: female edition. I need to find separate nicknames for the two.

"I didn't volunteer. I was _born_  as a recombinant DNA _experiment._ I did not sign up for my life, thank you very much. And I was _created_ by a company called Itexcorp, whose science division recently split went underground. I escaped their labs with other test subjects at age 10, and grew up on the run from everything and everyone around us. So no, I didn't join a super soldier program. I was born into a weapons program."

The group around me was silent. I leaned against the doorframe again. The awkward silence persisted. I gestured to the table "Please, don't stop just because of me."

A nod, then Skye started right in. "Not much on Po…"

\---

After the group dispersed, I wandered off to find my room. And by room, I mean closet with a bed. Still better than some places I've had to live in, that's for sure.

As I lay down on the bed, I thought over my situation. 

I was here because they needed super-human backup. SHIELD was once again using me as a weapon. But because Fury wasn't hanging over my shoulder, I could use this team to get my injury healed and escape. I just needed those feather-like implants.

As I lay there, there was a knock. I sat up and slid open my door. Standing there was super-hacker. Ugh. Nicknames _need_ to improve.

"Hey. I guess I just want to apologize for everyone's rudeness. I guess we didn't expect your life story, or for you to be so different than we expected. Everything around here seems to reference back to aliens or Captain America, so we haven't had to really deal with unethical science experiments."

"That's understandable. I mean you don't usually get people who just flounce in, call out their inhumanity and expect happiness all around."

Skye gave a tiny smile. "Believe me, I know. I may not be superhuman like you but I’m still the "new girl" here. Anyways, Coulson wants you to go be observed by Fitz and Simmons. Something about an injury of yours?"

I gave a small smile and started walking to the lab. "Believe me, you're going to want to see this."

When I reached the lab, I saw that the science pair were just finishing looking over Peterson. Simmons was a little too engrossed, if you know what I mean. So I decided to take a bit of initiative. I motioned for Skye to move out of the way, and slipped of my jacket. As I unfurled my wings as far as I could without pain or hitting stuff, all the attention sprang to me.

"So you need to look at my injury?" All the reactions gave me one of the happiest moments I'd had in months. Peterson seemed shocked but accepted it. Good, he can't overreact right now. Skye looked like those girls once they meet Tony- absurdly confusingly starstruck. And the Science buddies looked at me like I just transformed myself into Jesus.

"How did you get wings?" Peterson seemed to be taking this best. Probably because he's the least sciencey.

"Good question my friend. I do believe I have had them since birth."

Simmons turned away and began looking closely at uninjured wing. "You said you were a product of recombinant genetic engineering? What were you mixed with?"

I rolled my eyes, "Yes I am. My DNA consists of about 3% bird DNA, more specifically, golden eagle. So you wanted to see my injury?"

A quick nod. I pull in my wings so that the injury was next to my shoulder

"Alright it's right here. An evil Asgardian Alien stabbed his spear through it. That same one that stabbed Coulson. But anyways. I need you guys to all do something for me."

A collection of very confused looks. Skye spoke up. Oops, I forgot she was in here. "Well sure. What do you need?"

I give a small smile, "Tony Stark designed me some prosthetic feathers. I need your help to make me temporary ones so I can fly to go get the real ones implanted. And I need this done _without_ higher-ups interfering."

"You want us to _WHAT?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand that’s the chapter. Hope you enjoyed! I guess this isn’t so much a cliffhanger as much as it’s just a good place to stop. Got a few questions though.
> 
> 1\. In honor of Femslash February, would anyone be interested in a (non canon) femslash oneshot from this universe? It wouldn’t affect the main story, but just a little fun bit.
> 
> 2\. Would anybody be interested in becoming a beta for this story? I’ve slowly feeling I need one, and my usual beta doesn’t really know Maximum Ride (love you Jessica).


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m baaack! Sorry, It’s been awhile. This chapter has been awhile in the making and I’ve been very busy, but it’s here now! Enjoy!

"It's not as complicated as it sounds. You just need to make me some plastic pieces and attach them to my wing. I'll get you the specs when everything's less crazy. Once those pieces are attached, I should be able to fly to Stark to get my more permanent implants. I'll chill out there to recover for a bit, and then maybe come back. I don't know. I haven't really planned past the "get the implants" part."

It was Skye who spoke up next "But why do you need us to keep this top secret? You're a SHIELD agent. Shouldn't they know what you're doing?"

I scowled. "I'm only an agent because the director offered me these same implants. It's been months. He's still making excuses for why he's not even using _one_ scientist to make them. So I'm using my sources and only sticking around to use theirs."

I could tell they were stunned and distrustful. I mean I guess I would be too. You meet somebody for the first time and they ask you to hide things from people they trust. Why did I think this was a good idea?

"Hey, we can talk about this later. You set up the communications or examine my wing or whatever you guys need to do. I'm just the skinny muscle."

After a conversation of glances, Fitz headed off to the communication center on the upper floor, and Simmons approached me and began looking closely at my wing.

Skye just kinda stood there awkwardly, before heading to join Fitz.

"So what actually happened on that helicarrier?" Simmon's voice was almost a whisper as she carefully touched my wing.

I was confused, "What do you mean?"

"During the battle of New York. Do you know what happened when Coulson died?"

Oh, that makes sense to ask. "Yeah. I walked into the room right as he got stabbed by Loki. Seeing him made me angrier, which caused me to be reckless. Being reckless got me this wound. This wound made me be off my game during the battle, so it got much worse."

Simmons nodded, "That looks fairly accurate. The main wound itself is fairly clean, but the rest of the wing around it is ragged. I think the best way to let it get better is just to let it air out. Try not to cover it if you can."

I smiled. "I think I can do that. My wings are much easier to deal with that way."

She gave a nervous smile before heading off to join all the others in communications. Yeah I'm extremely feared. They even like May better than me. But they don't really know me.

I rolled my shoulders and started to the stairs. I then decided to go get changed. Putting on tight clothing with huge-ass wings can be an unnecessarily long progress.

\---

 By time I had on my tight catsuit, Coulson and Ward were back from finding the location that we would raid.  Everyone was gone suiting up, so I went to retrieve my spear. I hadn't used it outside of practice since New York, and Tony had redesigned it for me. The points were at a different angle and were made of a stronger material. He said that it had traces of adamantium and vibranium, and I didn't need any reminder to know exactly how strong that was.

As I held the cool metal in my hands, my memory flashed back to New York. While I didn't have PTSD like Tony, but I still had issues beyond my wing. I could still see all the details of that brain attack mid battle. All the Chitauri ranks, hierarchy, biology, battle formations, culture, history. Everything. And I couldn't tell anyone. SHIELD doesn't know about my brain attacks, and I wasn't planning on letting them know. If they figured out that I could get information like that, I would never be allowed to leave. I'm barely allowed to leave as is.

And with that thought, everyone began to gather in the back of the plane. As we all gathered, FitzSimmons were drooling over Peterson. I mean, its not like he's bad looking. He's really attractive. Just, not my type. Because, clearly, I have a type. Obviously. Psh.

"This time, I want answers. Means we go in quiet, do minimal damage to the facility and the people inside"

Coulson then began passing out orders, I would go with him and Peterson through the loading dock. Clearly, we're the attack team. I'm glad though, that means I can finally move my muscles after being trapped in this flying can.

\---

As we entered the warehouse, everything seemed empty and abandoned. Coulson asked Simmons if there was anyone else, and she responded that there wasn't. But something didn't quite seem right. When the team decided to call the cell phone we traced, I tightened my grip on my spear.

And at that moment, the doors to the storage container were ripped outwards and a soldier stepped out and threw the bin at us. As soon as Peterson stopped it from crushing us, I used my wings and kept on top of it. They may be stronger than me, but I was faster and more experienced. Plus, even though I couldn't fully fly, I would have an advantage in the air. But how to get them in the air...

As I was contemplating this, one of the centipede soldiers decided to climb on the storage bin with me. Oh well, looks like I better get into the action. I work better on instinct anyways.

Once the soldier found his footing, he ran at me. Once he was within range, I hit him as hard as I could with my spear. It looks like I cut his face. Here's hoping there's no healing factor. When he was still reeling, I flared my wings to gain the extra momentum to swoop down on him. At the last moment, he rolled out of the way, causing my spear to pierce the metal beneath him. A growl erupted from my throat, and I pulled the spear out of its hole. Once I turned to strike, everything fell to instinct. As I lashed out, stabbing and snarling, my brain seemed to take a backseat. Just like New York, I felt like I wasn't in control. I, seemingly, had been shoved into the back of my own mind. It felt like I was possessed or mind controlled or _something._  And honestly, it scared the shit out of me. 

And through this entire attack of fear, my body kept attacking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I wonder what's controlling Max... ehehehehehehe
> 
> I want to know though, do you want me to keep following AOS, or pull away at best opportunity?
> 
> Anyways, please review. It actually does motivate me to keep writing.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! I’m really happy with this chapter because after watching the winter soldier, I finally know what direction I want to take this story and this is a large step in that direction. Also, in this chapter I strongly hint at a character from the comics, but don’t worry about figuring out who they are. I’ll give a small description of them at the very end. Now enjoy!

When I finally was back in control, I could feel myself shaking. The spear dropped out of my hand and clanged against the floor. I closed my eyes. I didn't want to see the destruction I had caused.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Coulson. "Come on, let's get back to the bus. We can have Simmons look at your injuries. I'll guide you."

I kept my eyes closed as he guided me, and I heard Peterson grab the spear for me. When we got back on the bus, I opened my eyes and made a beeline for the bathroom, grabbing a change of clothes on the way.

Once in the bathroom, I avoided looking in the mirror while stripping down and enter in the shower. With water streaming down my body, I tried to make a plan. I needed those wing implants, so I needed to call Tony to figure out what needs to be done. I needed to figure out where Itex was at that point, so I needed to do some research using Tony's resources. So I need to contact Tony and get to him. 

I guess it's time to make a call.

After finishing my shower and getting re-dressed, I went to visit Fitz and Simmons about using a phone. They looked a bit confused, but once I explained that I was calling Tony Stark they were more than happy to offer me a phone to use.

After exactly three rings, the phone was picked up. But I spoke before any other voice spoke. "JARVIS, It's Max. I need to talk to Tony."

"I shall forward your call. It is good to hear from you Miss Ride."

I gave a small smile, "You too Jarvis"

The phone was silent for a few moments. "Talk to me."

I rolled my eyes, "Hello Stark. Great to hear that you're still alive."

"Glad to hear how worried you were. I was last really in danger weeks ago"

"Yeah, well I was busy. So how're my wing implants coming?"

"Done. Just need you in New York."

"About that… I need the specs for the temporary ones so I can get there."

"No problem, but you know that once SHIELD gets them, you’re gonna have to bail."

I ran my hand through my hair. "I know, but I was planning on ditching out fairly soon." I paused for a moment "Is Hawkeye still hanging out around LA?"

"Clint? No idea."

"No, not Clint. The other Hawkeye."

"Oh I see what you're doing. It's not a _great_ plan, but it's certainly not a bad one. Yeah, the other Hawkeye is still there. I'm guessing that's where you'll be?"

"I'll definitely hang out there for awhile. Maybe I'll get a tan."

I could hear Tony laughing through the phone. "Yeah, don't do that. But leaving SHIELD now sounds like a pretty good idea. I've been seeing some of the things that they've been investing in, and I don't think you want to be there when it all goes to hell."

" Yeah pretty much my thoughts. Hold on." I covered the microphone "Hey Fitz, talk to tony about getting you the implant specs. I need to go pack."

He looked shocked, and was almost physically shaking when I tossed him the phone. As I ran off to my room, I ran into Coulson and almost knocked him to the floor. I apologized and kept running and gathering my stuff. If I didn't get off the plane before it took off, I would never another opportunity to successfully leave SHIELD. I grabbed my bag and headed down into the main cargo hold. I only needed to grab the spear, check in on Fitz, and then get the hell out of dodge. But when I got there, Coulson was waiting for me, arms crossed like a scolding parent. 

I stepped forward and dropped my bag. "Sorry for not notifying you, but I'm leaving."

"Sorry, but I don't think so. Orders from higher up say to keep an eye on you, and that means not letting you leave." He turned his head to the right and gave a nod. I turned to see who he was looking at, but before I could I had my arms pulled behind my back. Based on grip and strength behind it, I could tell it was Ward holding me. I struggled slightly and his grip tightened, just like I had hoped.

I gave a twisted smile, "What? Don't you trust me? You know my story Coulson. Are you gonna just throw me in another cage?"

Coulson looked away. Good. He feels ashamed. "Take her to detainment." and as Ward pulled to move me, I acted.

I dropped to the floor and flared my wings. Ward let go in surprise, and shoved at my wings. I could feel bones and feathers bending but I had to keep moving. I grabbed my bag and threw it towards the exit, not turning to see if it made it out.

I used my wings to lift myself quickly and make a distraction as I dashed towards the case holding my spear. While the spear wasn't essential, it would be a pain to replace and Tony would make me grovel for another one.

But before I could reach it, Coulson was standing there in my way. He started to say something, but I couldn't afford to wait to hear it so a well-placed roundhouse kick got him out of my way. I leapt forward, grabbed the case, and swung it behind me while pivoting. The momentum kept me turning and I hit Ward, knocking him to the ground.

So I ran.

At that point, we were off the ground but low enough that I only had to glide to the ground. Which was hard enough on its own. But once I hit the ground, I found my bag then ran.

I kept going until I was on a sketchy side street where I could catch my breath. I dug through my bag for my wallet. I always had emergency cash, a fake (but recently SHIELD issued) id, and my little book of relevant locations.

After I calmed down and figured out where I was going, I found my way back to a main street and asked some dude in a bar to call me a cab.

I gave the cabbie the address and a chuck of cash, then no more questions.

I sighed deeply against the seat. Fleeing. I knew fleeing better than anything else in my life. Until I joined SHIELD (joined? forced into really) I had been either fleeing or planning to flee my entire life. So I was doing what I do best of all.

I was fleeing. To a person that I didn't even know if they were as trustworthy as I had been told.

To Kate Bishop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we’re now leaving the world of Agents of SHIELD and heading into original plot area. And if you can’t tell by the end there, I’m bringing in characters from the comics starting with the young avengers. I’m going to be messing with backstories and probably transplanting the entire team to LA, but we’ll see what happens as it occurs.  
> For those who aren’t familiar with her, Kate Bishop is the leader of the Young Avengers. She has no powers, but is very skilled at archery. She was given the name Hawkeye by Captain America while Clint Barton was dead, and when he eventually revived he let her keep the name. She is currently is main character alongside Clint in the current run of Hawkeye by Matt Fraction, which I think everyone should read even if you aren’t super familiar with the comics universe.


End file.
